Fr. JC Maximilian

Is it Possible to Live This Way? Vol. 1 Faith

In my last post, I tried to describe the diagram that appears on page 64 of the book. It represents the movement or dynamic of freedom. Freedom, we will recall, is the satisfaction or perfection of a desire. Freedom is the satisfaction or perfection of our ultimate desire of the heart, which can only be God because only God is infinite. So in a sense, all freedom in this life is imperfect because we are not yet in complete communion with God. It is our relationship with the infinite Mystery, with God, which expresses the dynamic of our freedom.

However, as we noted, often times in life other people and things cross our path. This is not necessarily a bad thing; it depends on our choices when we encounter these other objects and persons. If we see in them signs pointing us to continue to follow the path leading towards our destiny, our union with God, then they are very positive things. However, if we put all of our focus on these objects and persons so that we leave the path to our destiny, then they have become distractions or worse idols. This is where sin enters in; it is literally missing the mark or falling short of the goal. Of course the problem is that there is often greater emotional satisfaction in these objects and persons along our path because they are nearer to us than our ultimate goal.

I have been trying to think of an example from my own life, my own experience, which I could share that would not be embarrassing to someone else involved or myself. OK, I just thought of something, which might not be the best example, but I think it will work. I like technology. While I may not always have the latest gadget, I do like reading about them, and often I do get them down the road. My computer is an important object in my life. I use it nearly everyday, and often for a good part of the day. On it I write my homilies, posts for my blog, as well as other projects for both the parish and myself. And the Internet is often a very valuable tool in some of the work that I do. I can quickly look up Church documents. Since I do not have a School of Community nearby, I have been meeting each week with a couple of priests for a video iChat in which we do School of Community. These uses of my computer and the Internet often assist me as I follow the Lord. However, the computer and the Internet can also become a serious addiction that takes me way from following my path to my destiny. Of course there are the obvious misuses of the Internet (visiting pornographic sites, gambling sites, etc), but there are also the more subtle which might not always seem to be morally objectionable. There are many sites for viewing videos. While I am not much of a YouTube fan, I can find Hulu and Veoh very tempting with some of the old movies and TV shows you can watch (I am a classic Star Trek fan, and Veoh has all the original episodes available to watch for free). There is nothing intrinsically wrong with watching a video on the computer, but when it becomes something that keeps us from doing the work that God has called us to in the best manner we are able, then we are missing the mark, we are falling short. We are giving into the quick and easy satisfaction, and losing sight of that which will bring us ultimate satisfaction/perfection — God. When we lose sight of our destiny we err, we sin.

So how do we resist the stronger, more immediate attractions and keep following God? First we need to keep a clear awareness of our destiny. We need to be reminded of our real desire, our real goal. Second, we need a wrenching force to pull us away from the more immediate attraction and put our energy into moving towards our destiny. The Church calls this wrenching force mortification and penitence. The reason we fast and abstain from meat on the Fridays of Lent is not because meat is bad, but so that we can call to mind how we are often distracted from our destiny and to get back on track. The word “penitence” comes from the Greek word, metanoia, which literally means “change of direction.” So instead of going after the thing or person which we are more immediately attracted to, we make an effort to change our direction to go after our destiny.

The important thing to learn from this section is that if it was just left up to us, we would not be able to stay on the right track. We would easily become distracted by these other attractions. We need companionship to keep us on the way. I learned this lesson during my training as a psychologist. I learned that it is not a question of IF you become attracted to a client, but rather a question of WHEN you become attracted to a client. The important thing is to acknowledge this “countertransference”, as we call it in psychology, to your supervisor. He or she then help you keep on track so that you are working towards the client’s therapeutic goals.

As a priest, I find the same thing happens. People come to us broken, and they share great intimacy with their priest. I can understand how a priest can start to feel an attraction for something more with a person. Sometimes the life of a priest can be lonesome (my married sisters tell me that married life can also be lonesome at time). What I find so helpful in spiritual direction, and now with School of Community, is I can be be challenged about keeping my eyes on my destiny, the road that God has called me to follow. And, when I am trying to change my direction, when needed, the community helps me to stick to it. I guess it is why AA and other 12-Step programs are so successful; the sponsor and the group helps the person see their blind spots, where they are getting off track, and then support them as they start changing their lives. Of course this keeping on the right track is what brings about true freedom; not freedom to do what one wants but the freedom to become the person that God has created us to be, to become united with God the supreme happiness. We are made for community.